To the dads

Today is Father's Day and I'm thinking about the dads in my life this morning:  my own dad, Bryan Russell, my husband who is a wonderful dad to our kids, my father-in-law, Phillip Sheppard, and my grandfather, Bud Arnold.  

I knew my Dad loved me from the time I was born.  I've always known it and never doubted it.  But now that I have my own kids, I realize even more how amazingly natural and easy it is for Dads to love their own kids and how one word seems to encapsulate what it is to be a loving Father:  SACRIFICE.  Dads who love their kids willingly SACRIFICE their own selves for their kids' sakes. This doesn't mean that the sacrifices dads make are easy, but that they will sacrifice for their kids when they would never make the same sacrifice for anyone else. This also doesn't mean that all dads naturally and easily and sacrificially love their children, but that this is how it should be and how it is when things are "right."

For some people, it may be more difficult to really know and feel this concept, those who are not blessed to have an earthly father who has willingly sacrificed and shown love even when it was, perhaps, a strain: it may be more difficult for some to actively believe and accept that this is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God (1 John 3:1). In fact, it may be a stretch to grasp that this is how we KNOW that we are His children, that He already proved His own love for us by sending His only Son.

The hope I have today and forever comes from a Father who is not strained or burdened or annoyed or bothered or required to show me lavish love but, rather, he delights to pour His love out on me!

It is a WILLING love.
"In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins." (1 John 4:10 ESV)

It is a GENEROUS love.
"He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?" (Romans 8:32 ESV)

It is a NON-RELUCTANT love.
"What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31 ESV)

So we know that God sending His own Son is how we FEEL loved by God. When we believe this and let this understanding penetrate to the depths of our hearts, leaking into every nook and crevice, this love totally transforms us leading to a joyful, child-like acceptance(faith) of this most precious gift we could ever receive(grace).

This is why I am most grateful for the Dads in my life today. I am thankful that they are image-bearers of the only perfect Father, passing on His love from one generation to the next. I am thankful that they have pointed me and my kids, both through their strength and weaknesses, to the True Source of fatherly love. I am thankful that they know Him and are looking to Him for guidance.

Thank you, Dads. The most precious gift you could ever give me has been received joyfully in my heart...there are two more at my house who need you, though:) Keep on keeping on, we are counting on you and are here to support and encourage you along the way!

I take myself with a grain of salt

I think back to who I was 10 years ago, 5 years ago, 1 year ago, 1 month ago...and I think how grateful I am that God did what it took to change me from the self-absorbed, egotistical, legalistic, cold-hearted person I once was! But then, wait a minute...10 years from now, I'll be thinking how grateful I am that He changed me from who I am TODAY into who I will be THEN.

And so I remember again: I will never "arrive."

I will, at some point and by God's grace, be embarrassed of how selfish and wordly and utterly unChristlike I am today, thought I know in my heart I'm worlds away from where I once was. It occurs to me that today, though I feel more "holy" than I ever have in my life, I still have sin in me, apart from the sins that I know of, that I can't even understand or even contemplate now; but since one day, I will look back and be able to see my own lack of maturity at this current point in time, I trust that a lack of maturity is here in me now, abiding deep in my heart, mind, and soul, seemingly hidden and waiting for the fullness of time til the Holy Spirit will penetrate, uproot, and replant His beauty within.

I take myself with a grain of salt.

I may feel spiritually mature but my perspective is limited to my own existence. I felt mature 10 years ago and now I realize I was so far from it that it is laughable. I may be further along than I've ever been before but I'm a very weak and ineffective standard to be measuring myself against.

Perhaps a sign of true maturity in Christ is knowing that I, by myself, lack what is needed for life and godliness on my own--no matter how much knowledge, no matter the amount of volunteer hours logged, no matter how many Bible study books are lining the shelf--but that it is His divine power that grants me everything (1 Peter 1:3). I was incapable as an 18 year old to see the immaturity in myself and will myself to change on my own. I might have seen some "big" issues, but I had no idea of the depths to which God would change my heart and mind! I was blind. And it is impossible for a blind man to heal himself: he must have someone open his eyes. I think that is what maturity in Christ means: God opening your eyes to more fully see Him so that, in turn, you may more fully see yourself in Him. Praise Him that the scales continue to be, sometimes rather painfully, ripped from these feeble eyes!

I think of Eustace in "Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Treader." He was turned into a hideous dragon because of the arrogance of his heart. The only way to be turned into a boy again was to have his scaled scraped off by Aslan's claws. And when he was changed back into a boy, he was not the same boy he once was! He was a new creation, someone altogether different than he was before his painful, scale-ripping experience.

I pray that the people I knew 10 years ago give me grace now to believe I really have been changed. I'm not the same as I was 10 years ago, 1 year ago, 1 month ago, 1 day ago. I pray I give other people grace to believe people really can be changed; to not judge someone based on who they used to be, but by who they prove to be and, perhaps even more fully, by who God will one day make them to be.

"It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no 'ordinary' people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilisations -- these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whome we joke with, work with, marry, snub and exploit -- immortal horrors or everlasting splendours. This does not mean that we are to be perpetually solemn. We must play. But our merriment must be of that kind (and it is, in fact, the merriest kind) which exists between people who have, from the outset, taken each other seriously -- no flippancy, no superiority, no presumption. And our charity must be a real and costly love, with deep feeling for the sins in spite of which we love the sinner -- no mere tolerance or indulgence which parodies love as flippancy parodies merriment."
--C. S. Lewis, From The Weight of Glory.

Give me Jesus

As far as I know, my 5 year old daughter, Elli, has never been taught about the second coming of Jesus. But last night in her bedtime prayers, she prayed, "And Jesus, please come down so we can meet you."

Her sweet, childlike, pure faith brought me to tears. She longs to see Jesus in the flesh and knows in her heart instinctively that something isn't all the way perfect yet. There is a lacking and her heart wants the fulfillment. Even without having studied the doctrine of the second coming, she yearns for it!

God, grant me an expectant heart, eyes that are always watching for you, feet ready to go at a moment's notice. Help me to be tethered to heaven and not this soil.

"Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory." (Colossians 3:1-4 NIV)

A Word for Workers

As VBS week approaches, I have been thinking more about the WORK of the Christian life. Sometimes it can feel tedious and even, at times, like we're spinning our wheels in vain. But God gently reminded me today that our MOTIVATION is what makes the difference between legalistic, duty-based efforts versus grace-soaked, heartfelt service.

"I tell you this, brothers: flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed. For this perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality. When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written: "Death is swallowed up in victory." "O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?" The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. THEREFORE(my emphasis), my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain." (1 Corinthians 15:50-58 ESV)

Notice the "therefore." Why do we work? Why is it that our labor is not in vain?

Because of the victory that Jesus has given us over death!
Because our sins cannot curse us to hell anymore.
Because death was swallowed up by His death.
Because death has lost it's venom to poison our souls.
Because the law is powerless to condemn us through Jesus.
Because we will receive knew everlasting, never-decaying bodies.
Because in Christ we will inherit the kingdom.
Because He loved us enough to give us this good news.
Because other people need this good news just like we did.
Because we have every reason in the world to work til He comes back.

Stay motivated, fellow workers! In the midst of the planning, decorating, shopping, singing, jumping, shouting, corralling, and, yes, even going a little crazy at times, make time to stay in the Word and remember the "why" behind your work. It is not in vain. You are appreciated. You are loved more than you know. You are part of something much bigger than you understand. You are blessed.

Awake my soul

There is a healthy craving to be had; a desire for nourishment to the soul.
Apart from God my taste buds dead; their pleasure in the foul.

One satisfying addiction exists to quench my thirsty heart;
of all that looks and feels and smells, faith grasps beyond its realm.

A safe obsession to hold my gaze, no danger in His care;
for He causes all things to work in harmony for my good.

Now good may seem a far-off thought when doubts and pains arise;
but the good He brings is good because He makes me like His Son.

Change this heart of stone, I cried; turn it into fleshy clay.
He heard and listened and came and bought and redeemed and restored and won.

One spark can hold a match to my eternal flame; the deepest longings of my soul fanned by His great Name.
Everywhere I try to look for fuel to satisfy; He gently prods the embers of grief to remind me of His love.

He can handle what I desire and all that I can fathom; He is a cistern that never runs dry despite my constant yearning.
To find the only true desire and feel the joy of abandon; there my soul feels the freedom it was made to encounter.

Oh joy of man's desiring, I find my rest in thee; and treasure every longing sense that begs me to return.
For in the moments of despair, then I know you're here; not to tempt and taunt and hurt, but awaken my heart to glory.

I was wrong

Faith.

For so long I got it wrong.  For so long I thought I didn't believe enough and that's why I wasn't getting what I wanted.  For so long I was a miserable Christian, feeling like I didn't measure up because my life wasn't turning out the way I had envisioned and that if I just could muster enough faith, God would grant me my wishes.  In my mind, God was the all-powerful, gracious genie who existed to serve me and make me happy.

And then finally when my faith was disappointed one too many times and when I was so unhappy and dissatisfied with my life that I thought maybe he didn't exist at all, I decide it:  maybe I was just concocting this idea of God in my mind and if I stopped thinking about Him and going to church and trying to read the Bible and live a "holy" life, God would cease to exist.  This "genie-God" who had failed to come through for me so many times would simply leave me alone and allow me to find something else to make me happy; something that would give me the freedom I longed for and the satisfaction of soul that let me rest from the constant craving of more...something...anything...

And I stopped.

Caring, believing, hoping, seeking, loving.  Genie-god died and I simply survived.  Life took some very drastic, fast, and furious turns towards chaos and one day I stopped again.  I noticed that I was one foot in the pit, one foot in the grave.  One more step and I would be gone and there would be no turning back.

And that's when He came.

In all His overwhelming love and senseless grace and pulled me up onto solid ground.  He gave me a new name and a new heart and a new song.

He showed me that faith is believing in His goodness, trustworthiness, righteousness, lovingkindness, mercy; believing in His character to come through in the good times and the bad; trusting in Him because you KNOW Him and He KNOWS you.  You can't have faith in someone you don't know...it would be stupid to place your life in the hands of a stranger.  Jesus is a person.  To have faith in Him is to know Him and believe that He is who He says He is and that He is true to His Word and that NO MATTER WHAT, He is still good.

When circumstances around me seem to point to His not loving me, I don't buy it because I know He died for me and so He will graciously give me all things (Rom. 8:32).  When my emotions betray me and make me feel abandoned by Him, I reject that and cling to His promise to be with me always, even to the very end of the age (Matt. 28:20).

Faith is NOT asking and hoping that He will grant my desires.

Faith IS believing He is my desire.

Faith is the blessed assurance of what is to come.  It is the conviction of the reality of Him and everything He has promised. (Heb.11:1).

Faith is our lifeline to the Faithful One (2 Tim. 2:13).

Do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord

“My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him.  For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.”  Hebrews 12:5-6

I have been and continually am guilty of regarding God’s discipline lightly.  Brushing it off; outright ignoring; refusing to come to Him and work on the sin problem; trying to treat the “symptoms” instead of attacking the root of the issue; thinking that His consequences aren't real and that He doesn't really care enough about me to actually cause something devastating to happen to me as a result of my sin.

I was wrong.

As a child of God, sometimes coming to God with our pain can temporarily lead to more pain.  Avoiding Him, however, always, every time, without fail, leads to exponentially more severe consequences and acute pain.  God treats us as His children (Hebrews 12:7).  His discipline is meant to lovingly and gently correct and, eventually, lead us into peace and righteousness; it is meant to mature us into the image of His Son.  If we reject His discipline and choose to see Him as unloving, evil, or arbitrary, then He is forced to use more drastic means to get our attention and to lead us into a right perspective in our hearts towards Him. 

If my own child does something wrong, then comes to me to seek forgiveness and restoration, my response through correction, reteaching, and consequence will be far less severe than if he does something wrong then tries to cover up his actions, all the while having a complacent attitude towards me.  My desire is for him to DESIRE my approval; to want to do the right thing because He knows I love Him and I only set boundaries for him in order to protect him, boundaries that will ultimately lead to his good.  The way He comes to me after he has done something against me has EVERYTHING to do with the amount, type, and severity of correction he receives.  The deeper the issue, the more drastic the consequence needs to be in order to fully uproot the problem and grow good fruit in place of the bad.

One question you must ask yourself is can you sense the discipline of the Lord in your life?  If not, why not?  The Lord disciplines His kids.  You may be undergoing a season of less strenuous discipline than other times of your life, but you should sense it nonetheless.  He is always working on us, we never have a point where we've "arrived."  If you don't feel this inward pull towards Christlikeness, you should ask God why and measure your relationship with Him against His Word.

 “Whoever spares the road hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.” Proverbs 13:24

The Lord only disciplines those He loves.  His correction is meant to restore, teach, build up, bring us to a better place.  Whatever is going on in our live is meant to lead us AWAY from eternal destruction, even if it does lead temporarily to more pain.  We are being perfected, refined, and molded into the image of Jesus Christ.  The process is a long and sometimes painful one…we have a long way to go and there is much work to be done!  But God’s glory and our eternal home is at stake.  It is THE adventure of the Christian's life and we have the ultimate tour guide;).  Submitting to his discipline isn't always easy but the alternative is absolutely impossible.